P.D.A. (Or the lack therof.)

Back in business once again. I got lazy, I hate WoW, honestly. After a rather interesting day, I guess I have to man up. It really pains me to say that yeah, I've been crushing for the past few months. My emotions something I really need to come to terms with. I've come to realize that I've suppressed them for too long. I've lied to you guys, yeah, I've been interested in a lot of people, but my inwardness is inhibiting. I suppose its fear of embarrassment. Yeah, I don't know how to spit game, yeah, I don't know how to sweet talk girls. Up to this point I never put much thought or stress on it. Sometimes I wish they offered a "Dating 101"

Off on a tangent, I'm really disturbed by the fact that I'm not in the emotional flurry that I expected myself to be about 10 mins before I started to compose this. In fact, I'm VERY irritated by the fact that a discussion earlier this evening with my dad and my friends spurred me to write this article.

Back on topic, I find it interesting how fast feelings for someone can die by not talking to them for a day or more. Small talk can go a long way. I also find it interesting how I almost always go on AIM just to talk to her. But in real life I find it hard to strike up conversation. I'm such a loser (<3 Self-pity). I find it interesting how jealous I can be when other people guys to her. Honestly, I hate that. I feel so...so...envious when people do that. As I'm now just starting to learn, "Love" is complicated.

I contemplate about this a lot. She leaks into my thought processes on the daily. She, anonymous as she'll remain on here, is I consider to be one of the coolest, down to earth people I know. She's real easy to talk to, and a few of our conversations have dragged on for hours. I'm infatuated, truly. But, she's too good for me. And she's too pretty, too talented, too good a person for someone like me. Alas, enigmatic she remains, despite a long friendship.

I don't deserve her, and even still I'm jumping the gun there.

Horrible way to announce who I like? Nope, because, I never explicitly did. Rather, I think this is another exploration of my emotions.

I leave you with this, a video of a extremely hard hit on part of Antwan Barnes of the Baltimore Ravens. This Sav Rocca guy gets BLASTED beyond belief.